School- Didn’t it sound horrible to all of us as kids? Sunday nights were no less than a nightmare when our parents used to say, “Get to bed. You have to wake up early for school tomorrow”. We hated it. There were days when we did not want to go to school at any cost. But our parents just didn’t understand. We felt devastated and left out when our parents did not seem to understand the pain we went through. Toughest were the winter days for those who had morning school. Getting up from the bed was like the harshest of punishments invented for mankind. Many of us would agree that the first thing we did after getting up was to wreck our brains and find out an excuse suitable enough to stay away from school. Kids nowadays are way more intelligent than what we were in our childhood. My little sister comes up with such excuses every single day, which keeps me updated about the weird things these little brains can think of. Here are ten excuses which children come up with to stay away from school.
10. Incomplete Homework
Statutory warning : This won’t work for everybody. Results will vary from person to person.
Though this is not a very effective method. But it is sure to work wonders for over caring parents. The kind of parents, or even mothers will do, who get hyper at every little thing in school. They want their little innocent babies to be ab all rounder. Studies come first, of course. So no compromises in that field. Try telling your mother in the morning that you did not complete your homework the previous day and wait for instant results. For some extra drama, you may add that it was going to be assessed for some important examination. Okay, you might get scolded or even thrashed (hyper moms, remember?). But no pains, no gains. You get to stay away from those boring teachers in school whose only aim in life is to make Einsteins and Newtons out of you. And then its your day! Do anything you want or fulfill the reason for which you wanted to stay home. If there was no reason at all, then just stay back and watch your favourite shows or go out to play. But remember, in the course of the day, do take out time to complete that unfinished homework or assignment which saved you earlier that day.
9. School has Declared a Holiday
This again is for all those kids blessed with COOL parents. Think of a reason strong enough for which your school can declare a surprise holiday. Say that a friend or a teacher met with an accident in front of school. Teacher would be more believable. Set up a friend who you know will be called up by your mother for cross checking. Extra brownie points for you if that friend too decides to drop school and stay at home. Later in the day you two can just go out and have fun. When I was in school, I particularly took advantage of the infamously pathetic monsoons of Kolkata. I used to tell my mother that there’s huge standing water in front of school.And bingo! It meant a two day leave from school. Try this one too.
8. Our Class Teacher will be Absent today
This again works wonders. Parents are those people on earth who, unlike us, think that school is only meant for getting educated. So when the teacher himself is absent from school, they find it pointless to send their wards to school. They find it better to keep children at home and utilize the day by studying at home. And studying at home is the last thing kids do. Right? A little lie can turn out into an entire day of fun. But be careful not to get caught. If your mother knows the teacher personally, or the teacher happens to be a family friend of yours, then stay away from such dangerous stunts.
7. Hiding Books
How many of us did this? And still do in fact? And doesn’t this trick work wonderfully? You just hide your books or copies needed in school that day and start panicking (mock panic) that you cant find them? Minutes later your parents join the drama and you just sit back and watch the show. It ultimately turns out to be a leave from school and a day well spent. The advantage with this excuse is that you can hide in the books in a very safe and secret place for more than one day. But make sure you don’t hide it for too long. Else your parents might end up buying another book for you. Enjoy these little guilty pleasures in life without an overdose of it.
6. Being Intentionally Late in the Morning
I had tried this on various occasions. The level of lethargy is the highest in the morning after getting up from a good sleep. You just get up and work extra slow on days you want to skip school. You know your school timings and the exact time when the school gate closes. So you take an extra minute in brushing your teeth, few extra minutes in the bathroom, you eat slowly, take time to wear the uniform and you are late.
5. Missing the School Bus
This is quite similar to point 6. You intentionally get late and miss the school bus. But wait, this is not the end. Your father might still drag you to school in his car. So make sure you take ample amount of time in getting late so that even when your father drops you to school, you reach to find the gate closed and come back home, ready to spend the unexpected holiday.
4. Wake up in the middle of the Night
You must be thinking how can waking up in the middle of the night help you to stay away from school? Well it’s easy. If you plan to give school a miss the next day, then get up in the middle of the night and walk up to you parents’ room. Wake them up and fake a very painful voice. Tell them that you are suffering from something very serious. Parents won’t be able to gauge the naughtiness of their young, innocent (!) offspring and they will easily fall into the trap. But make sure you fake something serious. Minor issues like stomachache or headache tend to get well overnight and next morning you might be sent to school. Rub your eyes till they are bloodshot. Tell your parents that you are having eyesight problems and they will believe you.
3. Visit the Washroom every 15 minute
This needs a little investment of time. Try this if you plan to drop school on a Monday. We all develop Monday morning blues. You have the weekend to develop this idea in to a full fledged one. Throughout the weekend, visit the restroom very frequently, holding your stomach. Take your cellphone or i-pod with you. Tune in to your favourite songs and keep listening to them. But outside your parents will be worried about you. They will give you medicines for loose motion or acidity. Don’t have them as the side effect might really cause you some danger. On Monday when you will still be going to the washroom, you will be asked by your parents with full dignity to stay back. You can continue this for the entire week and have a short vacation.
2. Return Home from School Halfway
Go out for school as you do every morning. Get ready, take your tiffin and start walking towards your school. Do not show any unusual sign. After going a few kilometers, take an about turn and start walking towards home. When your parents ask why you are back, you can come up with anything. That you were not feeling well, or you saw an accident which made you feel dizzy. You can even say that after reaching school you learnt that the school had declared a holiday because some delegates were to pay a visit to your school. Say anything and your parents will buy it.
1. “I am not feeling very well today”
This had to be leading the list. This age old excuse has worked for ages, right from our grandparents’ time. If backed by powerful acting skills, parents still fall into this trap and we end up spending a day at home.