“Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.”
The day one says “I do” marks the beginning of a new chapter of life. And this chapter like others is not easy. A married life is hard to work upon, but for some the results are worth it while for the others, the effort is too much to work upon. They give up hope on their marriage, breaking the vows and promises that they once made with their whole heart. The reasons why a marriage fails may depend on the couples, but there are some common ones that are hindrances for every married life. So, make sure your married life is devoid of all these reasons.
Cheating, treachery and betrayal are the barricades to every relationship, but in marriage they are the ultimate blockades. Betraying your partner by having any kind of relationship with someone else is not justified at all. Cheating and betrayal might start as an innocent friendship, but it can lead to physical intimacy or emotional dependency if you are too close with someone else other than your partner. This leads to extramarital affairs and infidelity which will sooner or later end your marriage.
9. Faulty foundation
No monument can stand tall if its foundation is weak and hollow. Similar truth marks the span of marriage. If the beginning of your wedding life is not concrete, then your marriage might have problems. This may happen due to many reasons like forcing the marriage, rushing into marrying without thinking about future plans, continuously suspecting each other or not being capable of understanding the other person.
8. Financial problems
Love is not the food of life and money may not buy happiness, but it can destroy it too well. Living in the fast moving world of consumerism and show off, we often tend to make money as our habit. This can be too problematic if only one spouse is earning and insecure feelings like pride and jealousy are bound to cultivate. If both the partners are earning, then problems may arise if one partner tends to exert superiority in the relationship just because he or she makes more money. We live in a world where money talks and in its greed, marriage cannot walk.
7. Lies and secret
The most basic ingredient of a successful marriage is trust. If a couple cannot trust one another, then there is no forever for them. Breaking the other partners trust, does not only mean cheating on them, it can also happen if you lie and hide secrets from them. Trivial lies or secrets that seem unimportant to you might be a big deal for your partner and who knows these small lies and secrets might accumulate so much that there remains nothing in the relationship but unsaid words. So do not keep any single little thing from your partner and expect the same from them.
In marriage, you cannot take decisions as “I”, but you have to take them as “we”. Many people think about their own interests and career opportunities, thereby neglecting their partner’s choice and consideration. This leads to fights and insecurities which may act as detonators to your marriage. At the end it all comes down to priorities, if you prioritize your individual self more than your partner’s wish and choices, then you are still living life as a bachelor in your head and soon you may become single again.
Lack of closeness and connection between a couple can make them forget that they are in a relationship. It is very important for every couple to keep the spark burning between them. If a marriage lacks physical and emotional intimacy, it cannot sustain long because it is like giving your partner the cold shoulder. Making your relationship intimate and special is the responsibility of both partners. Practice little acts of kindness, appreciation and enjoy physical intimacy as much as possible to sweeten your relationship.
Somewhere between handling career, children, bills and other responsibilities, there remains very little time for a person to spend it with his or her spouse. In that case, there can arise a lot of other problems like absence of romantic moments, lack of physical and emotional connection, not sharing life’s major moments and thus giving up on maintaining a happy married life. To spend quality time with your partner and doing little to big things with them can mean a lot for your relationship. Both the partners have to constantly cooperate with each other to make time for their relationship as well as other responsibilities.
Some people say that lack of interest between couples can ruin a marriage. But, have you think why this problem arises? It is because couples do not communicate with each other. As mentioned above, you have to take out time for your spouse, but you have to spend that time together, sharing things with each other and not just discussing about their responsibilities. Communicating with each other means that you have to share your feelings with each other and be honest. Many couples do not communicate and hence they lie and fight all the time.
You fall in love with your spouse, but you have to be with their family as well. Families are hard to please and in India many marriages break because the wife cannot live with the family or cannot make them happy. To welcome and please every member of the other partner’s family is difficult and sometimes impossible. This leads to differences between couples and none of them can leave their own family, so they bid goodbye to their married life.
Imagine you have lost touch with your best friend. Heartbreaking, isn’t it? Now imagine that best friend is your spouse. How do you feel now?
Most marriages break because the couples are not true friends with each other and friendship is important because a true friendship lasts a lifetime. A friendship inculcates almost everything that you need to maintain your relationship, but if you have lost that friend in your spouse then you cannot last your marriage.
Marriage is not easy, but if you truly love your partner, then you can surely make it work. To communicate and spend time with each other is very important in marriage. Remember to enjoy little moments with your partner like watching a movie or eating dinner, share as much as you can and keep the romance going by making tiny surprises. Do not let financial, family or any other problems to dampen the spirit of your marriage. Face the unexpected surprises of life together, always appreciate, complement, criticize and complete each other.